Put the “Me” Back In Meaning!

So what do I “mean” by that? Well, in order to complete something in your life that’s been on your mind (i.e. re-launching my blog), you will need to deal with two major challenges (or at least these are the ones I see most often in myself, my clients, my friends and colleagues). These obstacles being our genetic DNA coding for procrastination, along with our personal “Dragons of Distraction.” So how do we overcome these?

By connecting with and embodying the meaning which drives our efforts. The meaning behind what we do, why we do it, and most importantly, what our efforts will bring to our lives and the lives of others. That’s where the “Me”-factor comes in. What part of “me” are we working to express? Which of my values, goals and passions will I be promoting through these efforts? Often we, especially as women, get so caught up, in doing for others, serving other’s agendas, or wanting to please, that we forget the “Me,” which gives our work true meaning. Men, you’re mired in that scenario too, you just have your own version!

So this week, as you are considering the next move in your completion initiative, I suggest you put the “Me” back in meaning.  Embody your goals, so they are real rather than theoretical. Banish them from that ever-rotating to-do-list.

For example, to succeed with my “Accessing My Inner Vixen,” initiative, I will make sure to create time to express my playfulness; a core value for me. In my life that means going to belly dancing and hip hop classes, because when I’m dancing and moving, I access my body’s own brilliant playful wisdom. I am more joyful, present and kinder to be around. These characteristics also carry me away from those afternoons when I’m glued to the computer.  Pushing me to take other areas of my work to the next level, labor to support the medical needs of some family elders and handle the many other details that clamor for my attention during the week. What holds “me-aning” for you in the world of your completion initiative? How can you express it this week?

I welcome your thoughts and ideas. I want to hear about your project!

I have a new section called, “Brain Candy,”  which will list books, workshops, articles, etc. that I hope will sweeten your life. My goal here is to provide valuable information for your exploration.

This week I’m one of the proud sponsors of Dr. Eldon Taylor’s book:

“What Does it Mean?”

Throughout these pages, Dr. Taylor shares life experiences that will lead you to revelations about your own life. This book will remind you of who you are and nudge you firmly back on the path to personal enlightenment.

Dr. Talyor is offering some great gifts as well.  Click here to see.

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The Completion Initiative

I look back and remember the faded placard stuck to my mother’s refrigerator door as it traveled from Elmont, Long Island to Stuyvesant Town to Battery Park, NYC. It read, “It’s not what we have done that plagues us, but rather what we’ve left undone!”

That quote always has stayed with me. Between the hundreds of people I’ve worked with over the years and the myriad of groups I’ve spoken to, not to mention a more than occasional existential chat, whether at a dinner party with a good friend or a passerby waiting next to me for the #7 train; as human beings, we often are left with something we ache to complete in our lives. Whether it’s something that when done will relieve a huge weight off our back (decluttering that filing cabinet) or a dream that we long to bring to fruition (completing that novel) stashed either in the recesses of our grey matter or our desk drawer.

So, being the human potential geek/junkie/enthusiast that I am, I thought up a community project, where I bring together my areas of passion  (productivity, science metaphor, humor, among many other areas). I plan to bridge the gap between longing and doing; and as a group, support each other in satisfying our craving to complete our chosen project, goal or task.

Each week, for 90 days, I will share some powerful and practical strategies to do just that, (on occasion, in addition, I may post articles, interview other experts, and record some audio). I’ll be welcoming people to share their insights and experiences to create a cyberspace conversation on what works and doesn’t work for them. I ask you to share your Completion Initiatives as well, as I share mine.  I can guarantee that if you commit to the process and stay in the conversation, you’ll be further along at the end than you were when you began.

Feel free to pass this along to others and let’s share in each other’s victories, as well as support each other in our respective challenges. The principles and suggestions that I will make are the same ones I’ve used with my coaching clients, as well as the two national life makeover campaigns I coached (SELF and FITNESS magazine). I’ve used these techniques myself, and have seen wonderful results all around.

Week 1

Step I- Clarifying and Declaring Your Completion Initiative

Ok, so this week, we will start by clarifying your Completion Initiative.

I will first share mine. I call it “accessing my inner vixen.” Oh yes, I’d suggest that you give your project a name that lights you up. Mine, makes me feel like Xena Ancient Warrior Goddess! For me, what inspires me is a project that gets me feeling like a super-hero in my own life!

Step II- Moving from “What’s Wrong to What’s Next!”

Crucial to the completion process is to NOT making yourself wrong for where you’re at, but  instead, focusing on how to grow into what’s next for you.. Personally, I struggled with a wicked eating disorder in my early adolescent-twenty something years, (120 lbs. to 91 to 180 lbs. in less than 2 years!) Yes, it’s true, I’ve come a long way baby (eliminating binging/self recrimination and maintaining a 30 pound weight loss for 15 years+). I stay active, (a dancing dame, and more than occasional gym rat), have a decent energy level (sans caffeine or other stimulants), and I’m sooooo much more loving towards my body than before. But I know in my heart, “I’m not complete… there’s more.” So after you clarify what your Completion Initiative is, give yourself a moment to acknowledge what progress you’ve made already (even if it’s mainly been ruminating and dreaming time, that counts!) I can guarantee you, you’re further along than you think! What’s your “What’s Next?”

Step III- What does your Completion Initiative feel like? Look like?

For me, it will feel like:

  • Having boundless energy (and of course building in down time)
  • Experiencing radiance and joy in my own skin, consistently
  • Being well-rested

What will it look like:

  • Letting go of between 10-15 lbs.
  • Going down 1-2 clothing sizes
  • Eating consciously in alignment with my hunger and letting go of the last vestiges of mindless and emotionally driven eating.
  • Doing one loving thing for my body every day
  • Consistently upping my physical strength and stamina
  • Being able to do a split again!

Ok, so that’s mine, what’s yours???? I REALLY want to know! This week, I suggest you clarify and declare what your Completion Initiative is, what it will look and feel like. I really encourage you to give it a name and suggest that it meet one (or more) of these criteria:

  1. Relief and a sense of accomplishment if you achieve it.
  2. Something that YOU  want to do (NOT off someone elses’s agenda or something you “should” do, out of obligation)   .
  3. It lights you up.
  4. It is in line with your values and priorities
  5. It’s a stretch but not a break and it takes something to do it.
  6. It is specific enough, so that after 90 days you can know, “Hey I completed this!”

One of my favorite quotes was sent to me by my friend, QT.

“Why not?” is a slogan for a very interesting life.” –Mason Cooley

Why not make 2011 the year (and decade) that you completed………….?

Please list your Completion Initiative in the comment section, so we can cheer each other on!

I would be happy to provide the most useful strategies and solutions to support you in your respective projects.